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How often have we heard those words?

Do you ever wonder what love really is? Like whose idea was it to create the concept of it? Google defines Love as an intense feeling of deep affection but what does that really mean?

We’ve all spent years going from relationship to relationship thinking that what we have is the real thing but then it ends. Some may cry one day and then move on to another person the next. Some become a shell of who they once were, cutting off communication with friends and family and life itself. Their days seem so much darker and nothing anyone says can make them feel better until one day they meet someone who makes them feel as though the love the once felt wasn’t love at all because this time it felt more real.

Love is funny. Not in the haha sense but more like “are you kidding me?”

Love, although hard to define can make you feel on top of the world one minute and at your lowest low the next.

Have you ever met someone who you thought was just the creme of the crop? Everything they did in the beginning was just perfect. They said all the right words, did all the right things, they were just amazing? Then one day everything changes. The phone calls turn to text, the good mornings turn to good afternoon or good night and eventually those terms come only every couple of days. Date nights are once in a blue moon, spending time together becomes a chore, anniversaries are forgotten, promises are broken and the love just seems lost? Whenever you are ready to just give up those three words keep you hanging on….I love you.

The question then becomes is Love enough?

A few years ago I wrote this poem entitled “He Wants…but is He”

He wants to be a man,
He wants to provide and build a home
He wants settlement, containment, refrainment,
but at the same time he wants to be free.
He wants to be a man,
He has it in his head what it’s like to be grown,
He wants security, priority, superiority,
but at the same time he wants to be free.
He doesn’t want to provide because it takes away from his personal growth, he can’t build a home because his hands remain selfishly in his pockets. He can’t settle and contain himself from distractions. He tries to refrain but, at the same time he wants to be free.
He wants to be grown, but can’t tell you what it means, he doesn’t want security because his ego will feel threatened, he looks for priority and superiority, but never gives respect but, at the same time he wants to be free.
Settlement, containment, refrainment,
oh how bad he wants to be free
Security, priority, security,
he doesn’t want because he got from me but,
He wants to be a man……

Now this can be both relevant to male and female but how true is this? How often do we find ourselves in relationships where people sell you the dream on the “perfect” Love. Perfection is attainable although many will disagree. My idea of perfection differs from yours so I think what’s perfect for me will not be for you.

People become so complacent in relationships that the “honeymoon stage” passing by before they even know it. Communication becomes a thing of the past and then the resentment and “what ifs” start to surface.

Does Love play a major role in relationships? Of course. Does it play the only role. Of course not! It’s about time people start remembering the littles things. The walks, random conversations on the couch, handwritten notes. Those little things are what I love the most about any relationship I may have. People get so caught up in the holidays and getting the big things that they forget that the littles things are what made you fall in love with that person. The way they talk, how the corners of their mouths twitch when they try not to smile, how they hug you and tell you everything will be ok. At what point do we stop being ok with just hearing the words I love you. When do we start expecting the actions to back those words up?

Love is great but …..

love2

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